I’m sorry you and Mommy have been fighting. I don’t understand why Mommy is so mean to you. Especially making you sleep out here on the sofa. If you want, you can come sleep in my bed. I don’t mind sharing. My bed is a little small, but we can fit.
Daddy, do you want to masturbate? Since, you know, Mommy isn’t doing it with you. I know Daddies need to do it every night. Actually, sometimes I do it too, when I’m alone. If you need to do it, I’ll just not look. I promise. And I won’t mind hearing you.
Yes, Daddy, you can put your hand on me there. I don’t mind.